spiritual gift

Those who work with me have undoubtedly heard me say that prayer is one of my lowest spiritual gifts. I am 100% sure about this, but I regularly get surprised reactions from people when I tell them.

What Is A Spiritual Gift?

To me, a spiritual gift is something you do that brings you and other people closer to God without requiring much discipline from you. The amount of conscious effort you expend distinguishes between a gifting and a discipline.

In other words, you have the gift of helps if you just naturally notice opportunities to serve other people and regularly choose to do so. If you are constantly having to remind yourself to look out for ways to help people, or if you struggle inside every time you are faced with the choice of stopping and helping or going on your merry way, you’re using discipline instead of gifting.

Personal Example: Leadership vs Prayer

Leadership is one of my spiritual gifts. If we need to get from A to B, I will naturally start organizing people, casting the vision, and generally trying to get us there. I have to remind myself to NOT lead sometimes. That’s a gifting.

Prayer, on the other hand, is always a choice for me. I don’t pine away in my office for the next chance to pray. When I’m running meetings, I almost always start lining out our objectives before remembering to “open” in prayer. I have to CHOOSE to pray. That’s a discipline.

Do you know your spiritual giftings?

Do I Have to Pray?

The short answer is “yes.” But I’ll let Jesus do the talking on this one:

Matthew 6:6 (NIV) – But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.

Mark 11:24-25 (NIV) – Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours. And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.”

Luke 5:16 (NIV) – But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed.

Long story short: Jesus assumes we will pray, just as he often prayed. Just because I’m not “gifted” in prayer doesn’t get me off the hook. Some people revel in prayer and others (like me) choose to pray. We might pray differently, and we might pray for different amounts of time, but we are expected to pray.

Another way to look at this is to ask, “Why did Jesus pray?” If anyone in the history of humanity had a reason to NOT pray, it was Jesus. He’s basically praying to himself (nuances of the Trinity notwithstanding). But he prayed often.

A Different Definition of Prayer

While I have to choose to have a dialogue with God in the classic head-bowed kind of prayer, Wayne Cordeiro taught me a different definition of prayer that is useful for me:

Prayer is thinking about something God has asked you to do in the presence of the Lord.

I might not sit down and pray, but I routinely check in with God about things he has asked me to do. That’s a form of prayer, and I don’t have to make myself do that one.

Maybe I have a mustard seed’s worth of gifting in prayer after all.

Summary

• A spiritual gift is something you do that brings you and other people closer to God without requiring much discipline from you (you naturally do it)
• Prayer is thinking about something God has asked you to do in the presence of the Lord
• Even if you’re not “gifted” in prayer, Jesus expects us to pray (just as he often prayed)

Discussion Starter

• What are your strong spiritual gifts? What are your weak ones?
• What spiritual disciplines do you choose, and how have they impacted you?
• Describe your prayer life.
• Does Wayne Cordeiro’s definition of prayer change how you would define your prayer life?

I recently pre-ordered the new book by Chip and Dan Heath called Decisive: How to Make Better Choices in Life and Work. One of the main points in the book goes like this:

Prepare to Be Wrong: we are overconfident, thinking we know how the future will unfold when we really don’t. We should prepare for bad outcomes as well as good ones. And what would make us reconsider our decisions? We can set tripwires that snap us to attention at the right moments.

That reminded me of one of my standard prayers: “God, please derail me.”

Praying Against Myself

I was almost finished with college, and I was really feeling the pull toward seminary. I had been toying with seminary since high school (even though it requires an undergraduate degree), so I thought I shouldn’t delay anymore. As a result, I didn’t apply to any job interviews through my college.

But then a funny thing happened: I had two job interviews show up on my schedule, even though I didn’t apply for them. I decided to go just for fun. Then I got an invitation to a follow-up interview on-site.

After a full day at the company, I prayed something like this:

God, I believe you are calling me into ministry. I believe I am called to start immediately and not delay. If I am wrong, change my plans. I guess I’ll go to work instead of seminary if I get a job offer from <particular division> at <particular company>. Otherwise, I’m going to seminary.

The next day I got a job offer from that division within that company. I accepted the job on the spot.

God’s Ways

Paul reminds us in 1 Corinthians 1:25:

For the foolishness of God is wiser than man’s wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than man’s strength.

I can do all the right things when trying to figure out God’s will…and still be wrong. So my last prayer with big decisions is for God to change my mind if he has a better plan in mind.

If you want a great book on the process of figuring out God’s will as best you can, I recommend The Power of a Whisper by Bill Hybels.

His five filters for testing what you “hear from God” are:

1. Is this truly from God?
2. Is this Scriptural?
3. Is this wise?
4. Is this in tune with your character?
5. What do the people I trust think about this?

Tripwires

The quote from Decisive talks about setting tripwires to help you know when to reconsider your decisions. That’s what I did when I set a very specific way for God to change my mind.

Please note, however, that you can totally abuse this practice. “God, I’ll change my mind if you give me a winning lotto ticket.” Remember that God is too smart to fall for something like that. If you’re trying to manipulate God with your tripwire, it’s not going to work. He made you. He knows what you’re up to.

Summary

• Use every tool at your disposal to figure out God’s will
• Pray for God to change your mind if he has a better plan
• Set some tripwires: tangible ways for God to show you that you’re wrong

Discussion Starter

• When have you tried to figure out God’s will for one of your big decisions?
• When have you been wrong about God’s will for you? How did you know?
• What are you trying to figure out right now? Are you praying for God to change your mind if he has a better plan?