March 17, 2019 – “The Art of Forgiving: The Journey” by Rev. Cody Sandahl

NOTE: Audio is unavailable for this sermon. Sorry!

Lay Reader = Romans 5:1-11

5Therefore, since we are justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, 2through whom we have obtained access to this grace in which we stand; and we boast in our hope of sharing the glory of God. 3And not only that, but we also boast in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, 4and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, 5and hope does not disappoint us, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit that has been given to us. 6For while we were still weak, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly. 7Indeed, rarely will anyone die for a righteous person—though perhaps for a good person someone might actually dare to die. 8But God proves his love for us in that while we still were sinners Christ died for us. 9Much more surely then, now that we have been justified by his blood, will we be saved through him from the wrath of God. 10For if while we were enemies, we were reconciled to God through the death of his Son, much more surely, having been reconciled, will we be saved by his life. 11But more than that, we even boast in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.

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Introduction

We are continuing our series this Lent looking at the art of forgiving. Last week we talked about how forgiveness starts with a desire to forgive, a recognition that not forgiving isn’t working for you any more. And asking for forgiveness starts with that same desire, the recognition that you’ve been on the wrong path and need to turn around.

This week we are looking at forgiveness after that change of inner attitude. Our text today is one of the most famous and important texts about forgiveness. Last week I shared that the Jewish Rabbis taught that forgiving someone three times was generous. Peter in this text offers to forgive seven times – quite lavish. But Jesus says he must forgive seventy-seven or seventy times seven times (depends on how you translate it). But it’s not a literal counting where you enter every time you forgive in a spreadsheet and get to rejoice when it hits either 78 or 491. Seven means completeness or perfection. So whether it’s seventy-seven or seventy times seven, the idea is completely complete – infinite.

That part you might already know, but then we get a troubling story about a servant of the king.

Matthew 18:21-35

21Then Peter came and said to him, “Lord, if another member of the church sins against me, how often should I forgive? As many as seven times?” 22Jesus said to him, “Not seven times, but, I tell you, seventy-seven times. 23“For this reason the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who wished to settle accounts with his slaves. 24When he began the reckoning, one who owed him ten thousand talents was brought to him; 25and, as he could not pay, his lord ordered him to be sold, together with his wife and children and all his possessions, and payment to be made. 26So the slave fell on his knees before him, saying, ‘Have patience with me, and I will pay you everything.’ 27And out of pity for him, the lord of that slave released him and forgave him the debt. 28But that same slave, as he went out, came upon one of his fellow slaves who owed him a hundred denarii; and seizing him by the throat, he said, ‘Pay what you owe.’ 29Then his fellow slave fell down and pleaded with him, ‘Have patience with me, and I will pay you.’ 30But he refused; then he went and threw him into prison until he would pay the debt. 31When his fellow slaves saw what had happened, they were greatly distressed, and they went and reported to their lord all that had taken place. 32Then his lord summoned him and said to him, ‘You wicked slave! I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me. 33Should you not have had mercy on your fellow slave, as I had mercy on you?’ 34And in anger his lord handed him over to be tortured until he would pay his entire debt. 35So my heavenly Father will also do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother or sister from your heart.”

Pattern

As some of you know, I rather enjoy skiing. I don’t get to do it very often, but snow skiing is very high on my list of enjoyable activities. Every time it snows I can hear the mountains whispering their siren song to me. And over the last couple of months I’ve been looking into uphill skiing and back country skiing. My thought was simple – if I could just run over to a snow covered trail that connects to a downhill area, I could go skiing much more frequently. There are several options for that within an hour of my house, and as a bonus – no ski lift tickets! My inner Swedishness loves that!

But I’ve never done that before. I know how to ski downhill. Not uphill. I know how to follow signs at a resort – well, actually, if you ask my brother or my dad my ability to follow signs at resorts is probably in question. So making up my own way down a mountain with no signs to direct me? Outside my comfort zone.

So in anticipation I’ve done a ton of online research. I’ve been to back country mountaineering stores to pick their brains. I’ve looked at equipment. I’ve watched for sales. With something this outside my comfort zone, I really need to learn as much as I can first. There’s a big barrier to entry.

But I came to a showstopper on this idea. At my last visit to the back country store, they told me about their upcoming avalanche class. “Avalanche” is not a pleasant word. And so I did some more research. The place I was going to try out first is a pretty popular bowl-shaped area. And the first thing I read about avalanches in back country skiing is that they are pretty likely to happen in popular bowl-shaped areas. Yikes! And this year hasn’t been a kind one for avalanches. There was a mile-wide avalanche near Aspen just a few days ago – it was classified, and I quote, “unsurvivable.”

Sandahl – out! No thanks! I’ll stick to the resorts, and my inner Swedishness will just have to deal with the lift ticket prices.

Now, maybe if I was really familiar with back country skiing, I could handle it. Maybe if I knew what to look for and did it frequently enough, I would know when the danger was too high and just turn around. But for a rookie? I’m not qualified. Best to just not do it.

Have you ever wanted to do something, but you didn’t feel comfortable or didn’t feel qualified or just felt lost and didn’t do it?

In a similar way, our willingness and ability to forgive is heavily influenced by how comfortable we are with forgiving. Are you a forgiveness rookie like me with back country skiing? Are you a forgiveness veteran? Are you a forgiveness master? How experienced are you with forgiveness, and how comfortable are you with forgiveness?

Martin Luther King, Jr said, “Forgiveness is not an occasional act, it is a constant attitude.”

To use what Jesus says in our text today, is forgiveness for you something you can count on your hands like Peter? Or is forgiveness for you something that is too frequent to count? Are you closer to seven or seventy times seven?

Another way to think about forgiveness is to think about what kind of clothing it is. Is forgiveness a tuxedo or designer gown, something you dust off whenever you are forced to? Or is forgiveness like your business casual wardrobe – something you put on frequently because it’s just something you nee to do? Or is forgiveness like your favorite slippers or a well-worn coat, something that fits you perfectly thanks to frequent use?

Insurmountable Debt

So that’s the first part of what Jesus says in our text today – he tells us to make forgiveness a habit, become a veteran at forgiveness, offer forgiveness as frequently as it is needed.

Now for the more difficult part.

Jesus tells this parable, he imagines this potential story, where there’s a king talking with one of his high-ranking servants. And this servant has accumulated an enormous debt. In fact, let me re-tell this story with some modern-day numbers to help us get a grip on it.

Every year, a king told his chief servants how much they needed to raise in taxes in their regions. And one particular servant kept coming up short. Way short. Every single year, he was short. But the king was still doing OK, so he let it slide.

One year, the king decided to update his accounting records, and he discovered that this one servant was now $6 billion behind. Now, clearly the servant was never going to be able to repay that amount. So the king decided to cut his losses and just sell the servant and his family to another king. It would only be pennies on the dollar, but at least he’d get something that way.

Upon hearing this, the servant begged the king for mercy. He asked for more time to repay it. The other servants snickered knowing that he couldn’t repay that amount even if the king gave him ten lifetimes to pay it back.

But to their great surprise the king called his accountant over. He told the accountant to move that $6 billion from the “debts to collect” column over to the “total losses” column. He told his accountant to scratch out the $6 billion debt for this servant and write in zero instead. The treasury would just take the hit. The servant was spared, and his family was free. Happy day, right?

As the servant left the king’s presence, he was thanking his lucky stars. And he made a vow to himself right then and there – “I will never fall behind again! I will do everything in my power to pay what I owe from this day forward. I will never need the king’s mercy again! And here’s a great opportunity!”

Just then one of the waiters in a local restaurant came up, and this waiter owed the king’s servant a good bit of money – about $10,000. The servant never wanted to need the king’s mercy again, so he resolved to squeeze this waiter for every dime he had. When the waiter begged for extra time, the servant threw him into prison instead and sent a note to his family that if they ever wanted to see their husband and father again, cut a check for $10,000.

The king heard about the servant’s actions, the king had the servant arrested and dragged him into the throne room. The king told the servant, “You wicked man! You learned the wrong lesson from my forgiveness. You have become more ruthless to avoid needing my mercy again, but instead you should have learned to have a merciful heart yourself. Now I will be just as ruthless to you as you were to that waiter. Let this servant figure out how to become a billionaire from prison. Take him away! And only give him half his food rations!”

There are two main points here. One is the insurmountable debt. The servant begs for more time. But let’s imagine I write you a check for $6 billion, but I tell you it’s not good for a little while. You’ll just have to wait 100,000 years or it’s going to bounce. Are you going to take that check to the bank? It’s impossible! I checked the list of billionaires, and right now there are only about 200 people in the world who could cover that debt, and I assure you that none of them are servants.

The second point is that the servant is supposed to trust in the grace of the king. The servant thinks he’s supposed to be ruthless from now on so he never needs to ask for forgiveness again, but the king actually wants the servant to show the same grace he was shown.

Salvation

In case you haven’t caught on yet, we aren’t the king in this story. And we aren’t the waiter in this story, either. We’re the ruthless servant in this story.

Jesus starts with infinite forgiveness and then says the kingdom of heaven is like this story of the merciful king and the ruthless servant. So we are supposed to connect the dots back to ourselves. We are the ones with an insurmountable debt toward God. We are the ones who are supposed to trust in the mercy of God, not be so self-righteous that we never think we need God’s mercy. We are the ones who are supposed to live with a pattern of forgiveness, not ruthlessness. Us!

The question is whether we realize it or not. The question is whether we are actually trusting Jesus. The question is whether we know things about Jesus or we personally know Jesus. How much are you trusting the king? How much do you want to trust the king?

If you want to be the kind of person who can forgive other people instead of festering grudges for the rest of your life, trust the king.

If you want to be the kind of person who lives with joy instead of fear over messing up, trust the king.

If you want to be the kind of person who has a purpose greater than yourself, trust the king.

If you want to be the kind of person who exudes grace instead of judgment, trust the king.

And if you want those things, but you don’t know what I mean when I say “trust the king,” I would love to tell you more. If you want those things and you want to know more how to make that happen, take out a blue prayer request card that’s right in front of you. Put your name and contact info on one of those prayer request cards. Say you want to meet with me. And fold that up and put it in the offering plate when it comes by later at the offering. I’ll get it and I’ll follow up.

If you want to have an inner heart that’s like Jesus but you don’t know how to trust Jesus in your heart, let’s talk more. Once you get started in that journey, you’ll be surprised how quickly Jesus will show up and make a difference in your life.

And if you don’t want to wait for me, start the journey with a simple prayer to the king. The most simple, famous Jesus prayer is “Lord have mercy on me, a sinner.” The king is merciful. Trust the king. Trusting the king will be the start of the ride of your life.

Summary

Sisters and brothers, “Forgiveness is not an occasional act, it is a constant attitude.” Forgiveness isn’t dusty formal wear you put on when you have to – it’s supposed to be a comfy pair of slippers you can easily slip into. Forgiveness isn’t something you receive without passing along to others.

Jesus said that the kingdom of heaven is like a king who mercifully forgives his servant’s insurmountable debt. And that king expects the servant to learn that same merciful heart as well. If that’s not you, but you want it to be you, trust the king. Amen.